Red. I hit the brakes, and I look up. I lower the volume of my music. I reach for my mug of tea. I take a sip. All along, I have my eyes on the house being demolished right in front of my eyes. For the first time, I see a house being torn down. A huge machine with a claw is eating away at its walls and insides. I sit there, and I look. I've overslept. I might be late for class. I might not be able to finish my breakfast. I look like crap. I'm stressed. I'm forgetting to eat. I feel like I'm losing someone. There's too much going on. But.. This house shaking off dust takes my mind off everything. The dust flies into the air along with the many memories. A new house will be built in its place. That piece of land is starting over. It's shrugging off that beautiful but old house and awaiting a new beginning. And I thought to myself.. Should I shrug off my beautiful life and start fresh even if it means risking a not so beautiful aftermath? What should I shrug off myself? I should shrug off inconsiderate people. I should shrug off hurt. I should shrug off my fear of commitment. I should shrug off people's misplaced curiosity. I should shrug off so much... Green. I take my foot of the brakes. I wipe my tears. I smile at myself in the rearview mirror to see if my eyes give me away. Good. I like looking indifferent when there's a turmoil of emotions inside.
it's that "someone's" loss. always remember that. 7aram you shed tears for someone who's not worth it.
ReplyDeletevery nicely written
ReplyDeleteWe keep on living, keep on learning, and keep on changing. Think of yourself as a new person everyday. Negative stuff associated w/ ur old self are simply in the past.
ReplyDeleteThe picture at the end, is it related to the past?
All the things you've been through, good or bad, make you who you are today. If I were you, I wouldn't regret a thing!
ReplyDeleteim good at that
ReplyDeletebeing indifferent
Bulletii
ReplyDelete:)
Big Pearls
Thank you:)
Kaos
Except, I'm the same person everyday with a change in perspective and feelings.
No, it's related to the turmoil of emotions.
Haj
I'm not regretting anything:)
Eshda3wa
Cheers:)
It is amazing how simple objects that we daily take for granted can tear us apart if they ceased to exist.. It is the emancipation of familiarity that tears us apart.. I guess we have to put some thought into things in our lives that we take for granted, to appreciate them
ReplyDeleteI love how you say "she saw herself.." it puts a 4th dimension to the character.
Chapeau
I am sorry I couldn't comment earlier but there is something wrong with the RSS
OpeRon
ReplyDeleteTrue.
:)
It's alright.
This is how it always is.
ReplyDeleteHow it is walking the fine line between standing tall and strong and falling apart.
It's always like that, when you become aware of the precarious and exquisite dichotomy intruding upon your conscious in those moments between collapse and carrying on...
You wipe your tears and smile at yourself in the mirror to pretend it's all better now.
;************************
ReplyDeleteI love this post WAYID
Ms. Baker
ReplyDeleteYet, even when we pretend that everything is well, we know that it is not. As long as we do not live in denial and learn to face everything, we will be okay.
I will always have the faith that everything will be alright, otherwise I would not have the strength of smiling at myself in the mirror:)
Outkasty
And if the post had feelings, it would love you wayed, too;*
Deep.
ReplyDeleteYou have talent...write more :) *grin*
wow, that was so touching, has so much depth. bravo ;)
ReplyDeleteAs for how u feel: everybody goes through that,I know how you feel believe me, yet you can't help but feel alone can you? Like you said, shrug it off or deal with it. just remember to keep your chin up;)
beautifully written .. my land is staying bare, I can't bare the thought of building anything in its place..
ReplyDeleteF.
ReplyDeleteHehe! *grins back*
G and L
Thank you;*
Fortunately, I do not feel alone. I just feel like too much is happening at once. I'll temporarily shrug it off and deal with it when the time is right.
Fourme
Thanks:)
One day, you'll get bored of the bareness, and you'll build without knowing it;)
fear of commitment.. aaaah :P
ReplyDeleteUm Mit3ib
ReplyDeleteHmm? Sheno?!;p
see i could try and give u advice but id rather advertise my new post :P
ReplyDeletenah really that speech has some of the best "life" advice u can get.
The being indifferent part... I just go quite... i think...
ReplyDeleteloved the way it was written.
ReplyDeleteDo0da
ReplyDeleteLol! 7allaaa;p
Hamitaf La B
Hmmm...
Rawr
Thank you:)